“There is something in you that wants to confront and triumph over your fears and doubts, and master the earthly forces, freeing yourself to be your potential fully expressed.”
Fears and doubts truly keep us in bondage and we are designed to live in joyous freedom.
Last night I let an old fear of spiders enter my consciousness. As I was pulling the sheet back to crawl into bed, I saw a large black and red spider dash between my mattress and the box spring. Of course, I imagined that it was a black widow and thought it unsafe to be such a close target. I slept in my guest room.
Scores of thoughts and feelings flooded my mind. I felt cowardly; I am thousands of times bigger than any spider,why couldn’t I use my vast knowledge to remove the danger. I felt fear. Should I try to remove it or just let it make a nest in my bed? I felt a little helpless and I felt very silly.
A few months after I first moved to California in the early 90’s I had my first real encounter with black widow spiders. I was moving to a different office in the same complex so the men from the Center were moving the office furniture. When they moved my desk, there she sat, a huge black widow spider. I was transfixed. I had never seen one before and this one was at least two inches long. The men came and went. No one took much notice except my Board President, a big man, a former Navy Seal who just casually said, that I shouldn’t get too close as she looked like a grandmother spider. I was certain that one of the men would get rid of the spider.
No one moved the spider!
My interpretation was that nobody cared about my life! Yes, indeed, I was quite dramatic and very short-sighted. remember, I was a dumb Canadian who had had no experience with poisonous spiders except from the movies. Later a friend introduced me to a pest control person who shared a wealth of information about black widow spiders. One thing he told me, is that they are very shy. You usually don’t see them because they are in hiding. He also told me that they will only attack if they feel threatened.
Upon reading this quote from our joyous living journal, I realized that that something in me which is all-knowing has never been reactionary, acted out of fear, or side-stepped an issue or a spider. That Presence knows me as a masterful, powerful and loving being. I use the helpful information and I make new choices. Every fear, when looked at in the light of Truth, becomes insignificant.
In the oneness of all life, I am safe in my world including my home.
Tonight I will have a talk with that spider. I will let her know that I respect her and she must find another bed to sleep in. I will remind myself that I live in a friendly universe and I will sleep in my own bed.