As we come to the conclusion to the month of April, autism will remain near and dear to my heart. In case you didn’t know, April is autism awareness month and those who live their lives surrounded by this diagnosis are trying hard to make you aware. I’ve done my share of the work, especially on April 2nd. This was the day where the world was “lighting it up blue”. Posting pictures from various landmarks, colleges, groups all taking on the blue spirit, had me pulled to bombard my friends in social media. However, the day prior, on April 1st, I shared a great visual from Talk About Curing Autism (TACA).
This image really had me deeply thinking. I remember way back in my Spiritual unfoldment, hearing the statement, “The first step is awareness”. I remembered several years later in a conversation with a friend stating that I am very aware of my life, now how do I get out of awareness? What I didn’t know is that there is an awareness of life as opposed to Awareness. Now, knowing the difference, I reflect on how autism has affected my life.
When parent(s) are dealt the news of autism, the stages of grief are introduced. Once the stages wear away (which, by the way, is probably never) then action/go mode is in effect. Decisions are made for a young child that would probably not be thought of unless needing desensitization to living life. Screams, that make one want to come to the rescue, are heard behind a closed bedroom door, as therapists work with inabilities to be flexible. Deciding to have a 3 year old child ride the bus 30-40 minutes to school, so that the future will be easier to handle, is a painful choice. Second guessing is a conversation that is had many times over. Trying to overcome self-scrutiny, while societal scrutiny is peering over your shoulder is losing battle. Avoiding stares of judgment while a child is tantruming becomes the norm. Autism can become all-encompassing, with the utmost goal of fixing what is wrong with a child. Here lies the struggle, the constant confrontation within. How does one continue to love a child just the way he is? Can one see who the child really Is when always trying to fix them?
Yes, this is part of my story and so is the following:
Seeing a child as a unique, emanation of God is a blessing. Seeing this in a child diagnosed with autism takes on an awe-inspiring tone. In the midst of this diagnosis, something bewildering is set upon the universe. A Knowingness that all in right with the world. For in these Beings are ways of communicating so far beyond comprehension, that just marveling at their abilities, is a shift in consciousness. Some of these beings were given a grim diagnosis; however, we are becoming so much more aware of their capabilities and way of expressing themselves, that a Spiritual revelation is taking place. And if you just stop to be witness of it, you will discover amazing things about yourself. Being in awe of a child diagnosed with autism isn’t that difficult. Know, they too, are a Spiritual Being having their own experience in this time and space as this human expression.
Each day I experience a child diagnosed with autism is an interesting one. When I focus on my 10-year old son’s abilities, I am amazed how his brain works. Yes, assistance is needed to help him along his journey, however, being that vehicle of assistance takes on a different understanding. It’s an honor to be a parent of any child, to be a parent of a child diagnosed with autism allowed me the gift to deepen my Spiritual strength. Believing is seeing, has brought a sense of freedom in my life and the understanding of my place in his. As co-creators in Spirit, as my son and I walk hand-in-hand, I know this experience will continue to lead me into greater unfoldment in the I AM.