We are all on a spiritual path whether we know it or not. Before I knew that there was a spiritual path to be on, I would often get stuck in ideas that would not let go of me. They stuck to me and I stuck to them. Most of them were not for my highest good. I practiced the blame game with alacrity. There was always something to fear, and then there was always someone to blame for that fear. (Believe me, I rarely considered that I could be the cause of my unhappiness.) I was probably typical for women of my age — there were so many things wrong with life — there was the government, my spouse, low wages, parents of the children I taught, the children themselves, and the weather. Just to begin. It was not uncommon for me to declare that the weather was just miserable. And it may have been stormy, or cold, or icy, or too hot, but none of those conditions makes weather miserable. Feeling that there was someone or something to blame made me feel righteous. I was filled with righteous indignation. Imagine what charming company I would have been! Haha. Nothing was my fault. But I was playing the victim. Of course, I would have railed against the idea that I was a victim. Through my eyes, I was simply describing what was so.
Later in my thirties, when I awakened to the awareness of divine presence, I was fascinated by God. I spent hours in meditations and contemplation. I wrote volumes about the nature of God. Most of what I thought I knew, I have now changed my mind about. But still it was a great change of direction to be contemplating something eternal, omniscient, omnipotent and omnipresent whose nature is love. I spent a great deal of time wondering about my purpose. What was God calling me to do or be specifically? That was not very productive as far as directing divine mind, but it was much better than the first two decades. It was healthier.
When I started understanding New Thought, I still contemplated God, but now as me. The Divine Presence that fascinates me is in me as me! During one of the first classes I took, I remember feeling overwhelmed by the vastness of subconscious mind, and how impossible it felt to change my entire way of thinking. I would often catch myself in negative thinking and often felt discouraged. Fortunately, we don’t really have to erase every negative thought we have had, we simply need to keep filling up with positive ideas and hopefulness until the tendency of our thought is more helpful than harmful.
Gradually, almost imperceptibly, I started noticing that the tendency of my thoughts were positive, hopeful and life-affirming. I noticed that there is always so much for which to be grateful. I notice that more and more things for which to be grateful come into my life. (Were they always there, and I just couldn’t see them because my filter was so negative? Or did my change in thinking actually change my life?)
I like to think it is the latter. Since then I did discover my true purpose which is to assist others in seeing their divinity. I feel thankful every day for my wonderful life!
Remember, it is a wonderful life and all the better because you are in it.
|A Gift From Some Students|