|One of 108 individual prayer wheels
surrounding the 12 massive prayer
Last week I returned from a trip to Northern California.
I was visiting my mom and stepdad’s new home in the mountains….DEEP in the mountains!
One hour from Redding, 12 miles from the nearest town, I found myself experiencing the most profound spiritual experience being in nature and completely disconnected from technology.
My mom picked up every tourist magazine in the area and I saw an ad for the Chugdud Buddhist Retreat Center about 45 minutes away…again, DEEP in the mountains!
They offered a 5:30 a.m. meditation and I had a silent whisper from my intuition, what I call my inner Soul Mama, that I needed to go and experience it.
So, I set my alarm for 4 a.m., got ready, and then panicked at the thought of having to walk from the house to my car in the PITCH BLACK.
I mean, living in cities for most of my adult life, I forgot how black it got outside.
I kept thinking, what are you so afraid of, Vidette?
Michael Myers!! I’d answer.
I watched the Halloween movies WAY younger than I should have when my older cousins locked me in my grandparents’ living room and wouldn’t let me leave until I watched the whole horror movie…the music still makes me want to hide under a pillow to think about it.
My irrational thinking was getting the best of me and I was CONVINCED he was waiting in the woods ready to cut me into pieces when I left the house.
Yes, a git gorey for a spiritual blog, but stick with me here.
After running faster than Usain Bolt running the 100 m sprint, I made it to my car and surprisingly, outwitting Michael Myers himself!
As I tried to keep my racing heart from jumping out of my chest, I drove up and down the long driveway, where, when I got to the road, sh*t, I thought!
Why the hell is the gate closed?
The gate that I never noticed because it was always open, is now shut, and I have two options:
1. Get out and open the gate and risk giving Michael Myers a second opportunity to get me, or
Phew! Ha-ha, Michael Myers! You didn’t get ME!!
I can’t turn back now! That would be crazy! …or would it?
Not a light on except the blazingly obvious headlights of my car making it VERY obvious that a stranger has arrived onto the retreat center.
I saw a light come on, then another, and another.
I saw some movement.
|One of 12, 3-ton Prayer
Wheels with over
147 BILLION prayers
embedded on them.
Most of the prayers I didn’t understand, yet, I felt their power.
I told them the quick story, strategically leaving out the thoughts that they could be serial murderers.
|My son, Rijken spinning
all 108 prayer wheels
releasing prayers to eliminate
war and famine and opening
up more compassion,
love and trust in the world.
I had been led, once again, to another Soul Mama moment by that super-silent whisper that morning.
What if I had chosen to sleep in?
What if I had chosen to make the attempt of backing up the long driveway and protecting myself from the “what-ifs” that were exploding in my head?
I would have missed a beautiful life experience.
|As I turned around,
I saw Rijken giving thanks to the
PMM (proud mom moment) –
I didn’t ask him to do it…
he simply felt led to give a bow of thanks!
I would have missed meeting these beautiful people who were so heart-warming, so compassionate, so inviting.
I would have missed the opportunity to experience something I had NEVER experienced before in my life for what?
To stay safe?
To stay in my comfort zone?
Where would that have gotten me?
It did get me out of my comfort zone….and VERY far out, I might add!
It got me new friends.
It led me to a beautiful experience that had my heart brimming over with joy for the rest of the day.
It led me to SUCH a beautiful experience, I took my son back there the next day to experience the peace and calm of the place that I had been SO terrified to go to.
What did I learn?
Fear will always appear…even when we think we have evolved beyond it, or have taken risks before and walked through fear with the misconception that we have conquered it forever.
Still, though, beyond the car alarm, the closed gate, the scary-ass drive through the California back-country, through all the what-if’s, through all the fear of Michael Myers, there was this one constant in my life….whispering….
My inner Soul Mama, my intuition, nudging me on.
Not pushing. Gently encouraging.
Not trying to outwit my egoic thoughts.
Just whispering….just trust….just trust….just trust.
What more could we experience if we just trusted the infinite guidance of that Infinite Intelligence who only has our highest and best good in mind?
The possibilities are endless.